So I can take care of you
by Hanyou Ryuoh
Summary: After escaping Azkaban, Sirius went right to Privet Drive to get a glimpse of Harry before starting his trip. But he was weak and needed to recover before his journey. Here's what happened that summer. Sirius/Oc Oneshot (Already posted on facebook "Fans of Harry Potter" page)


It was a cold night at Privet Drive, with the autumn chill reaching deep under the heavy Cloak I wore. I had travelled all the way from Azkaban just to be here and watch him. It had been worth it. Though perhaps I had almost scared him to his death, I was able to watch Harry, and right after he had given those muggles a lesson for mistreating him. If only I had controlled myself after that night, I might have been able to raise him in a true home. Trying to rid myself of those kinds of thoughts, I transformed back into my human self and attempted to apparate to Hogsmeade. I tried really hard, but it was no use. I was too weak, I hadn't had a proper meal in ages and I had already used a lot of energy in transforming twice. With an enormous effort, I managed to transform into a dog once more and fainted right there.

….

I woke up feeling still a little dizzy. My body ached as if I had been hit everywhere, but still the grass made a nice cushion… perhaps, too soft. What kind of grass was this fluffy? I opened my eyes in confusion, and noticed that somehow the roughly cut grass and the broken park games had been replaced with a room lit only by the rising sun. It was cosy, with the whole floor of lacquered wood and that was slightly lighter than that of the furniture. "See? You made him wake up with all your babbling! Go on; make tea and some food so we can all have breakfast!" A mince girl was striding from one side of the room to the other, chatting to an unseen person in the room while she set a small table, and brought a pan with sausages, then with eggs, and then with toast. At last she called: come on, Snuffles! Let's have breakfast together! I wondered how she knew my name, when she started saying "Is it alright if I call you Snuffles? I just thought it suited you, but if you don't like it, maybe I can figure out something better." I tried to tell her no as doggishly as I could, to which she happily squeaked "You really are a smart dog! He doesn't even stare at us for being two, does he?" I scanned the room looking for the other person. There was no one but us here.

…..

After a couple of days I felt with as much strength as I remembered I had before Azkaban. The fact that she kept cooking for three helped, too. She had not only managed to pull our way to her house, which was three blocks away from the ark, but she had also managed to push me up a small set of stairs into her living room (which explained the bruises). Her name was Leah, and the only odd thing about her was that when she was really nervous or very busy she seemed to think she was two girls. Her cooking was excellent, and in payment for taking me in she let me bring her the instruments I would not contaminate by carrying with my mouth, and scaring nosy, rude kids away from her windows, which were always open. Still, I could only stay for so long. I had to go looking for Peter before he did any more harm, but I still had not recovered enough of my strength to fight him. One way or another, I could not leave her. What would she do without me? I was being very helpful wasn't I? She needed someone to take care of her, otherwise those kids would keep calling her names when she was busy baking her wonderful tarts. She was too kind to be angry at them, but used to hurt herself those times. The night I decided I should leave for good before I started caring too much for her, a kid threw her a stone; she jumped, and cut herself really bad as she tried grabbing the edge of a table where she had put a knife. She was afraid of going out; she had not done it in ages. But she needed stitches, and she could not do them by herself. All she did was start arguing with herself. But I could not help her, not as Snuffles. I would have to transform.

…..

I pushed her onto the sofa and considered lapping the wound, but I knew I could just make it worse. So I made my choice. I set my head on her lap lightly and headed for her room to transform. I only paused a bit to do my best to close the windows. My clothes were ragged when I transformed, but there was nothing I could replace them with. I paused a moment. What if I only made things worse?

Then she began calling me. I could not help myself from slowly walking back into the living room with her. She had turned around, opening her eyes very wide as she saw me carefully approach her. She even stopped arguing. But I could only get a few steps close to her before stopping and lowering my head just like Snuffles would whenever she would tell me off for some reason. "Snuffles!" she called once more. My head rose by instinct. Rather than scared, Leah looked puzzled. My eyes drifted then to her still bleeding wound, and her eyes followed mine. "Oh, it's nothing, really" she said as she tried to cover it with her dress. But I had to do something. I hurried to get a cloth, hot water, and everything I needed to fix her. If only I had a wand with me. Once again I found myself a few steps from her, pleading through my eyes that she let me take care of her wound. She quietly extended her arm towards me and I set to work immediately.

….

When I was done, we both kept staring at the wound, neither knowing what to do. I slowly lifted my eyes to try to tell her what was going on, but then she said: "She says you're the one from the news, but I keep telling her it isn't you. Or is it? Did you really kill that many people? Why did you help me then, why not just kill me and take my belongings? What use do you have for me?" I just glanced at her face for a second, but couldn't bear to see any more. Her eyes were full of hurt, doubt and something I was still unable to name.

I dared not answer. She had given me a normal, loving life perhaps even warmer than the one I had before losing to Pettigrew. It had all been nothing but an illusion. I made my choice. I transformed then, right in front of her. I had to go and clean my name. Right now, I was not fit to take care of her. I first needed to clean my name. I turned back, at the door, just wanting to see Leah a last time before the start of my hunt. And she smiled and said: "I'll wait for you to explain, then." And she silently blessed me with the loveliest smile I will ever see in this life or the next.

I never saw her again.


End file.
